188.成为赞美之人
成为赞美之人。这可让我们的好品味得到更多的赞扬,这说明我们在他处已获得经验,知道何为优秀,从而知道在所处的场合如何进行赞美。赞美可以提供谈资、模仿的范本,并激励人们去做值得称道的努力。而且,这也是用优雅的方式向我们面前的杰出人物表示敬意。有的人则与此相反,他们用讥笑作为自己说话的伴奏,自认为贬低不在场的人就能恭维在场之人。也许,他们可用此手法对付浅薄之人,因为这些人注意不到对每个人都说别人的坏话是多么的狡诈。许多人都跟随这一策略:他们崇尚今天的平庸事迹,胜过昨日的丰功伟绩。审慎者一眼就能看穿这点小把戏,他们既不因为评论者言过其实而沮丧,也不因别人的谄媚而得意忘形。他们明白,那些人是在做同样的事情,他们根据不同的说话对象采取了不同的手段。
188.Be the bearer of praise
Be the bearer of praise. This increases our credit for good taste, since it shows that we have learnt elsewhere to know what is excellent, and hence how to prize it in the present company It gives material for conversation and for imitation, and encourages praiseworthy exertions. We do homage besides in a very delicate way to the excellences before us. Others do the opposite: they accompany their talk with a sneer, and fancy they flatter those present by belittling the absent. This may serve them with superficial people, who do not notice how cunning it is to speak ill of everyone to everyone else. Many pursue the plan of valuing more highly the mediocrities of the day than the most distinguished exploits of the past. Let the cautious penetrate through these subtleties, and let him not be dismayed by the exaggerations of the one or made overconfident by the flatteries of the other; knowing that both act in the same way by different methods, adapting their talk to the company they are in.